Season 1, Episode 2
Confessions of a Mixtrovert
DJ Eshelman is joined by his friend Matt Blount to have a discussion about a common topic – Introvert vs Extrovert…
Matt talks about some very cool ways he works with this in his marriage. DJ talks about ways recognizing the various ways we expend and replenish energy is important if we want to be ready to leave the world better than we found it!
Ultimately – the goal is to stop calling yourself intro- or extro- and start being comfortable as a mixtro-vert!
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Podcast PDF Transcription
Download the PDF transcription here!
Extroverts vs. Introverts
he main difference is that extroverts gain energy by being around people. Introverts gain energy by being alone.
hen you say, “Oh, I’m very shy, I’m an introvert”, that actually is not giving yourself room to be successful in a social environment at all, because the reality is, that’s not what it is. You’re not an introvert because you’re shy.
It’s important to note that there are different ways in which we relate to the world and it becomes essentially a language, is the best way to describe that.
he thing we have to recognize about introverts/extroverts is, that when we say that’s how they replenish energy, we also have to realize that’s how they lose energy too.
ake sure you’re recharging properly.
26:03: If you’re an introvert and haven’t recharged before going into a presentation, you’re more likely to clam up and feel panicked. If you are an extrovert and haven’t had that recharge, you’re more likely to try and get that validation and that energy from the people that you have there.
ecognize your limits.
Why Replenish Energy
he main difference that I see is that, as far as saying something you regret or worse yet, doing something that is outside of your character, and things like that, it’s setting a bad example at that point. It is making it so that you have this feeling of remorse that causes you to be less likely to do something later that the world would benefit from.
to just be yourself.ne of the ways to combat this is, if you are susceptible to this and you are giving a presentation in a situation where you either know you’re getting feedback or you realize you’re not getting in feedback and you need to adjust your strategy is,
n the end of the extroverted side, if you’re going into a situation like that and you haven’t felt energized and validated, then odds are good that you will try to domineer a conversation which is off putting for it. Let me dispel a myth here, that is off putting to other extroverts, not to introverts.
ecognize that you have limits, and if you go past that limit, you are actually sapping yourself of energy, and the people that are energetic around you will actually cause you to lose energy instead of getting that.
ou can be naturally outgoing and introverted at the same time.
y encouragement for people is to actually get an action plan going.
he introvert needs that ally and needs to have that relationship with them so that when the extrovert is, you know, the center of attention or whatever, they can actually then take the advantage of that and say, “I’d like to hear from so-and-so.”
f you don’t have one and the other than you just have one side.
he key thing that I think might miss get missed a lot with this is, when we label introvert, when we label extrovert, the biggest problem with that is that we are limiting someone.
ersonality tests can be a really damaging thing in situations where you’re not really working with that person long-term or you’re not in a situation where you will stay that way, you will get pigeonholed and put into a situation where you are living in your strengths instead of growing.
want people to live in the un-comfort zone. I want people to be in that place of discomfort as often as they can stand it because that is the only way we grow.
t is important that we work on the things that aren’t natural to us. That is the only way we will really grow.
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